The diverse beautiful body of Christ

This year has been a crazy adventure, one in which I can look back and see God's hand every step of the way. Let me tell you though, it has not been easy. I am not sure if I have cried as much in my whole life as I have these past months. I feel as though God is breaking me down only to build me back up HIS way. One thing God has been teaching me over and over is to let go and allow others to love me. Love me? This is something I have struggled with my whole life. I have built up the walls so high, only reaching out to love others but am SO terrified of needing love in return. I went through a pretty rough break down where I was on the verge of burnout and really wrestling with questioning if anyone cared about me. I felt as though so many were asking of me but there was no one reaching out to love me. I remember laying in bed one night in tears when God asked me why I was looking at love as one sided. He filled my mind with the beautiful faces of precious teens and children in my life who loved me so deeply and showed me in any way that they coul; through hugs and kisses, encouraging texts, drawings, etc. In that moment I realized love is not one sided, you don't separate the people you love and the people who love you, love is reciprocal. Today as I stood in front of church and stared out into the congregation of such a diverse mix all I could see were the beautiful smiles of a group of people who loved me and supported me 100%. They shared with me that they had come together to raise support for my trip to Guatemala. My church is not a wealthy church, we are all struggling financially but everyone gave and I know for many of them that giving meant sacrifice. This group of people, my church, come from such different backgrounds yet Christ has brought them together to be a family and family is what they are to me. In this tiny little church, in one of the most violent neighborhoods of Chicago, I have found the gems of the city, I have found the body of Christ.