Getting back to my roots

Today I decided to paint.  I decided to paint because some how I felt I lost myself and I needed to get back in touch with who I am. 

Last week I decided to return home for a much needed time of rest away from the city, so I went back to Sheboygan to be with my family.  There was a moment where I was sitting and playing cards with my dad over lunch in a small down cafe when Jackson Browne and Cat Stevens carried me back to my past, life before Chicago.  Suddenly a piece of me, that was missing for so long, was brought back to mind.

It's the joke among my friends that I live under a rock.  They talk about movies and artists of their childhood and they're always baffled that I don't know them. I typically just laugh and shrug not really knowing why I don't know but as I sat in that little cafe with my dad I was reminded.  I don't know movies and artists they knew because I grew up very differently.  I was raised on the music of my parents childhood.  I could sing the lyrics of just about every song by the Beatles, Carole King, Jackson Browne, Cat Stevens...and so on.  While I did watch movies and tv growing up, it wasn't a large part of my childhood.  My days were spent barefoot running around the yard with my brothers.  I was a "country girl" as many here joke. 

So why am I bringing this all up?  Because recently I realized that when I moved here I decided to be completely here.  I didn't want to come in comparing life here to life in Wisconsin.  I wanted to be fully present in my community so West Garfield became my world;  I live here, work here, go to church here, my gym is here, and as I dove into being fully present here I began to really soak in the culture of this place.  As I went deeper and deeper into the culture I started to forget my own roots.  I know this all may seem confusing and weird to someone who has never lived outside of their own culture but something I realized just recently is that embracing the new does not mean you have to let go of the old.  I'm a complex mix of two very different cultures.  I love the hustle and bustle of city life but I feel most at home out in the woods with no one around.  I love going with my friends in the city but I'm also very content to sit alone and paint all afternoon.  One minute I may be listening to Rap and R&B and then the next I may turn on some Bluegrass.  I have had a rich life of so many very diverse experiences and it's ALL of the many pieces that have made me to be who I am today.