Learning to be men

"Can you help me?" Jacob asked as he placed a baby doll on his back and handed me a blanket to strap it on like they do here in Guatemala. Jacob loves to play house and always wants to be the dad. I watched him as he proudly walked around the porch with his little baby and it got me thinking.

So often I hear parents scold their little boys when they pick up dolls or tell them, "Dolls are for girls." I completely disagree. I remember growing up my brothers and I always played together often times one minute we would be playing house using dolls or cats as our children and the next minute we'd be up in trees with our faces painted with mud. Playing with dolls is not a "girl" thing, children are acting out what they see and experience and are learning to do the same. My brothers not only grew up playing with dolls but they often helped out with babies as well. They grew up to love children and at the age of 16 my brother had a car seat in his car and would care for my nephew all day for my sister. He knew how to change diapers, burp a baby, clean spit up, and everything else he needed to know in order to care for a newborn.

I remember specifically talking to Adam when he shared about moving to California and he shared that he wanted to go for a while but that he would have to return soon because he wanted to be a male figure in Landon's life. My nephew Landon doesn't have a father but my brothers have stepped up and been amazing male role models in his life. They bring him along to do yard work, build and fix things, go fishing, or skateboarding, all the things a father would do. I love and admire my brothers so deeply, they are true men.

So as I watched little Jacob playing with his baby doll, pretending to be a daddy I refused to tell him to give the doll to his sister and go find a car to play with. When did learning compassion and care become a "girl" thing? Our boys need to learn how to be fathers, to love and to nurture little ones. It makes me so very proud to watch the kids here and how even the teenage boys are constantly scooping babies up into their arms to snuggle them. This past weekend I had the privilege of working alongside 3 amazing men as we did a therapy weekend with the children here. I cannot express what a blessing it was to watch as these men scooped little girls into their arms to kiss them on the cheek, played soccer with the older boys guiding them to use self-control, comfort a crying child, talk them through their problems and pray with them. We need more men like this in our world, we need men to step up and show our children what being a father looks like. It breaks my heart how few men are involved in children’s lives. But I write this blog not as a complaint but a praise for the men I do have in my life who are investing in the lives of children, and an exhortation to continue to do so, you are making a huge impact.